I was afraid of the moment when I would finally understand that hope was gone. I thought it would break me. It didn’t. The pain had already taken everything it could.
“Broken Heart Still Alive” is out 14 November. The picture on the sleeve isn’t made up — it was taken in the days when it was hardest, and I left it as it was.
Every week
If a song is finished, it shouldn’t sit for a month waiting its turn. From now on they come out a week apart. “When Hope Dies” is next, on 24 October.
·The Lake
The Lake waits
“The Lake” is on hold. It isn’t right yet, and it won’t go out until it is.
“Girl in the Painting” goes out 31 October. My life has a before and an after, and the line between them is the first time I saw this painting. It was never mine — all I ever had of it was a wallpaper on an old phone, too small and too soft. What’s on the sleeve is as close as I could get back to it. I’d rather have that than something clean that isn’t it.
No date for the fifth
Four of them are written. They go out two weeks apart — three weeks was a long time to sit on songs that already exist. The fifth one is a third finished and I keep walking away from it. It hurts too much to stay with, so it gets no date until it’s done.
Cut the first vertical for the debut. There are two seconds of almost nothing before the last line, and every instinct says tighten it. It stays — that pause is the whole song.
The order changed
“Still Love You” was going first, and it’s the safer song. “Now You’re the Sound” goes instead, because it’s the one that explains why any of this started.